agony

Ashes


Set me on fire.
Make your move,
Break me once again.
Your justice does no good.
I wish to perish in the flames
Freeing myself from the burden
Of your truth.
I have opened my soul wide enough
For you to take the last.
So burn me to ashes already,
I can’t stand staying alive. 

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Substitute


Disfigured shadows,

Metal bars;

I am sentenced to an eternity

Inside of your mind.

So dry and colourless.

Oh, mama, mama…

How many times

Have you warned me

About the dangerous dreams!

I am stuck in one,

Looking at the starless sky,

Mixing tears with wine.

Ah, so replaceable!..

I have so many substitutes.

Wake me up!

Kick me out of your head for once,

Have mercy…

Let me awaken from the nightmare

I have staged.

Body frozen,

Forced to stare into one direction,

Why is everything so blurry all of a sudden?..

I will take my skin off

And put a smile on.

I will smile at you

And dissolve from your memory

Along with the last drop.

Ah, so replaceable…

Read my mind


I’m as useless as a dry camellia

Lying on the window sill.

Looking over the city lights

I drain the last of my hopes

Outside the tall building window.

My thoughts are carving calligraphic letters

Out on my bones and muscles.

Every curve and every stroke

Of my mind’s deadly brush

Makes me want to scratch my own brain out

And eat it while I’m still conscious.

Morbid eyes are getting deeper

As they let your enchantment through.

Melody of agony is so bitter,

And yet so beautiful,

Just like those little moments

When you’re holding a sharp shiny knife in your hand.

Cut me open, tear the flesh from my bones,

And read my mind.

Dancing on my death bed


Words. So many words,

They don’t fit on a page.

I love every one of them;

I despise all of them.

Whirling in my gut,

They become a part of me;

With each word written

A big piece of my spirit is torn away.

Eternal struggle

Of the pain of letting them go,

Of my poetic intimacy,

And my weary consciousness,

Is extended for too long;

The bloodcurdling levels

Of my never-ending misery

Exceed the wonders.

Serenity and inspiration

Are my best friends

That are leading my path

To the grave.

Even after my life

Comes to an end,

They will still linger

On my death bed.

When I’m at the verge of dying

Look into my eyes,

And you might still see

Them dance in

The fire of my agony.